Whilst I was still in Hertfordshire, Ken Lownie, the Bank Manager from Dar, who was now divorced and still pursuing me, came to the UK on leave and we went off around Britain on holiday. He was very good to me, spent a huge amount on gifts and took me to all sorts of events. After his leave he was to get promotion and become head of the bank in New Delhi. He was desperate to marry me. I was in a state of complete confusion. I was very lonely, didn’t know what I was going to do with my life but just knew that Ken was not right for me. He wanted me to get all the necessary innoculations so that I could fly to join him in India. I collapsed in tears in front of the doctor and confessed that I felt as though I was sliding down a roof top and about to go over the edge. She recommended that I see a psychiatrist in Exeter. I followed her  advice and the Bents put us up at West Pitt while this happened.

Very shortly after this Elizabeth (known as Wish) Stringer phoned me from Nottingham saying that she had started a dress shop in partnership with another couple and they were looking for someone to help in the shop. It was a great job. Wish and I shared the work and looking after Jo and her daughter Charlotte. Jo and Graham and I lived in the two little rooms above the shop. Graham was attending Edge Grove School as a border and Jo went to the Dorothy Grant Infant School in Nottingham. We were very busy in the shop. ‘Compact Ltd’ catered for ladies who were size 38 to 46. I remember we were visited by Miss Boot (of Boots Company) she was quite young, in her twenties I think, but very large – hip size 52 – so we were quite challenged.

Wish decided to see if we could find a firm that did attractive clothes in large sizes and eventually found a make called Kunik. Wish always took me with her to choose garments and I really enjoyed the work. Miss Boot became a regular client of ours and a big spender. I suggested that there might be housebound folk who would be glad of house visits and so we started to do this as well. One of us would call on the client and take her measurements and ask what styles and colours she liked and then bring a car full of garments for her to try. This also brought success.

During this time Joanna was suffering with tonsilitis on a regular basis. The local doctor said she must have them out but there was a waiting list of three years! When she developed an abcess in one ear, I decided enough was enough and I took her to see a private specialist. He said the matter was urgent and told me the cost. I am afraid I burst into tears because I couldn’t afford it. However, he was extremely kind and put Jo into the local hospital and did the op himself for no charge. I’m afraid though that she now has a perforated eardrum on that side.  

During the holidays I had to drive my battered A40 down to collect Graham from Edge Grove. The Stringers were going to sell the business and move to Aldeburgh in Suffolk, which meant that I couldn’t stay either. Joan stepped in and we bought Corner Cottage in Tunstall. Joanna went to Fairfields School in Saxmundham where I had been taken on as a teacher for the sum of £48 a month as I was unqualified. It was a small school run by Miss Partridge and Miss Henderson who lived in the flat above. I was unqualified so my pay was low. At night the two ladies would snoop around checking the work and so on and I remember well the day that I was taken to task by Miss Henderson for sharpening the pencils with a sharpener instead of a knife – so wasteful she said.

Shortly after this someone suggested to me that I should apply to a Teacher Training College to get qualified. Apparently Margaret Thatcher was offering grants to Mature Students (I felt like a cheese!) as there was such a shortage of teachers. Full of trepidation I applied to St Osyth’s College in Clacton. I was interviewed by a Miss Pilmer. I knew that my qualifications were pretty awful – six O’ Levels. However, I did point out that I had taken my exams during the war when the school had a number of unqualified teachers from different nationalities and so we didn’t have the best chance of getting higher qualifications. Miss Pilmer went on to tell me that she had been Head of the Education Department in Nairobi at that time, so I thought my chances were sunk. However, it seems the gods were on my side and I was accepted. I was given a choice of two boarding schools for Jo, All Hallows in Norfolk or Hawthorns School in Frinton on Sea, which was much nearer to where I was to be in college. So that was settled and I packed up and took Joanna to school and myself to Margaret Parsons Hall at St Osyth’s. Note from Jo, no mention of when G transferred from Edge Grove … Graham remained at Woodbridge School as a boarder.

My time at St Osyth’s College was a really happy one. It was exciting to go back to learning again. I was sent to Margaret Parsons Hall which housed a number of female students. They weren’t all mature students, in fact I think there was only one other mature student who was a 29 year old who was going blind. Her intention was to qualify and to then teach blind students. There were about twenty six mature students in all and we met up each morning for a session with our senior tutor focusing first on general education and then went on to study our main subject choice with another tutor – in  my case, English. 

The whole group met together for other subjects such as art, drama and dance. All these subjects were about teaching primary school children but it soon became clear that neither the partially blind student or Roger were suited to this! I particularly remember one occasion when the female dance tutor was getting us to do various things with tambourines which included running on tiptoes into the centre of the room in time to the tapping of the tambourine and then taking big giant steps backwards in time to the big bangs. We were, of course, acting the part of primary age children. Everyone entered into the spirit of this including Graham Still (a huge ex boxer and an ex-Colonel of fifty two. All except Roger, who sat down on the edge of the stage with his arms folded and flatly refused to join in! It soon became obvious that some of us were not suited to primary school teaching. This was awkward for the authorities because that was what we had enrolled for. However I assume there must have been some discussions at top level and Roger and Margaret (the blind lady) were excused from certain classes and given tutoring for senior school.

Roger was pursuing me relentlessly, always helping me on with my coat and getting next to me in line for the canteen. I found this really irritating as I had come to be totally free and meet and enjoy the company of all the other students. During my free time I did get to know and enjoy other members of the group and Roger used to go out in his canoe.  I would watch him rolling it off the end of Clacton Pier. One evening I was in a pub with a group of my friends and I bought a raffle ticket and with it, won a bottle of wine which I somehow found myself sharing with Roger and a couple of others.

We had started college in the September and at Christmas, I went home to Corner Cottage in Tunstall. Roger spent Christmas with his parents at Saxonbury Farm in Sussex but left them on Boxing Day and motored up to be with me. We spent a lot of time together and got engaged and married the following July. I remember how annoyed  the teacher was when I moved from the front seat to sit in the back row with Roger.

We rented ‘Old House’, a big Georgian house at Wakes Colne. It was quite a distance from college but very cheap because the owners just wanted reliable tenants. Roger did his main subject in Maths and was training for Secondary School. My main was English and I was expecting to teach Primary. At his time I had a lot  of pain in my neck due to a fall years earlier playing polo. Apparently I had roughed up the top three vertebrae of my spine and they would fuse together. The doctor put my head into a sort of canvas helmet and strung me up with some weights on the end of a bar. This was supposed to stretch my neck and release the pressure. During this time we were taking our finals. I remember being in a lot of pain while writing my final English paper and being so glad when it was over and we drove out  to The Old House.

I helped Roger unpack the car and as we were taking things out of the boot I suddenly saw my English papers. I had walked out of the exam with them instead of leaving them on the desk to be collected! I burst into tears but Roger told me to get into the car and we drove back into Clacton. I knew the very nice tutor who had been invigilitating the exam. He wasn’t actually tutoring at the College as he had just lost his wife after only three years of marriage. So we drove to his house and I poured out my sad story. He was very sweet and said that he still had the exam papers to hand in and he would add mine to them but I was never ever to tell this story to anyone. However, I think that as I am now 95 it is safe to tell.